I must tell you a secret
I do not know my tos from toos
or what day of the week it is
or if it’s 12am or 12pm
it always takes me a second or two or even five
to figure out where my left is and where is right
your right or my right?
it took me a long time to learn how to tie my shoes
when they came undone during school I would
wrap them around each other and stuff them back
into my sneakers, I do this a lot in life, compensate
for what I do not know and for what I can not do
but I know that you do this too
everyone
is late for dinner sometimes
except maybe caterpillars, who live on a plate
everyone is ugly
sometimes
even rabbits are not much beneath all the fluff
like how a balcony is just planks of wood
so no, I can’t tell you reflexively, is it effect or affect?
and does it matter?
it depends on who it effects or what it is affecting
or the other way around
I must tell you a secret
I do not know me from you
or you from everyone
so you can not take from me
what you do not already have
and I can not find what I’ve lost
for you’ve lost it as well
or have you found it, like everyone else has?
I spun as a girl of three and eight and twelve
and my mind spins still at twenty-six
revolving around pointless inquiries,
making little progress, enjoying the velocity
the dizziness, the confusion
I lay still
my brain rocks my body to sleep
