the rabbit is just a rabbit
the window is just a door
is it a sin
to hold this thing
that always asks for more?
it’s the same spin you did
when you were four
over and over again
until you’re on your knees on the floor
never again, you say what you’ve said
a thousand times before
but it never ends
its had your wrists since you’ve known
that the window is a door
you could leave through at any moment
you never bought it but you still own it
your own blood is a noose you
didn’t tie around your neck tell me is it a sin
to carry along this thing
that will not let you rest?
it’s electric, it’s magnetic, it clicks with a dull thud
it finds its own kind wherever it goes
with both eyes closed
it’s the same spin that you did
when you were 10
again and again until you vomited into the sand
it’s the same spin your father did
again and again
till his life coiled around the drain and left him
an empty man
it’s the same spin his father did
and his before him
his brother his sister his cousin
every single one of his friends
you walk down roads
with hungry eyes and hungrier hands
your need a knot in your lungs
your fingernails itch
there’s never enough you’re never enough
you can only be yourself if they give you a kick
if they wind you up if they whet your whistle
if you find what you’re looking for amidst the
shine and grime
though you know already when you catch that fish
who you’re gonna feed it to;
that-which-devours, that which hides under your collar
call it an exit wound
call it a birthmark
call it friend
what does it matter?
It’s made you a husk its got you
counting on luck its made you a slave
to lady Fortuna
